Both “sorry for bothering you” and “sorry to bother you” are grammatically correct, but they refer to different time frames and situations. “Sorry to bother you” works when you’re about to interrupt someone or ask for their time—it’s a preemptive apology before the interruption happens. “Sorry for bothering you” acknowledges that you’ve already interrupted or taken someone’s time—it’s a retrospective apology after the fact. The key difference is timing: “to bother” looks forward to an interruption you’re about to make, while “for bothering” looks backward at an interruption that already occurred. For example, you’d say “Sorry to bother you, but do you have a minute?” when approaching someone’s desk, and “Sorry for bothering you earlier” when following up later.
Both phrases serve the same polite function of acknowledging you’re taking someone’s time or attention, but grammar nerds recognize that “to bother” uses an infinitive (showing intention or future action) while “for bothering” uses a gerund (showing completed or ongoing action). In practice, most people choose based on when the interruption happens rather than thinking about grammatical structures. Understanding this timing distinction helps you sound more natural and appropriately polite in professional and casual communications.
What’s the Difference Between These Phrases?
The grammatical difference lies in verb form and timing. “Sorry to bother you” uses the infinitive “to bother,” which points toward future action. “Sorry for bothering you” uses the gerund “bothering,” which refers to present or past action.
Think of “to bother” as the polite warning you give before interrupting. You’re saying “I’m about to bother you, and I apologize in advance.” This version typically introduces a request or question.
“For bothering” acknowledges an interruption that’s happening now or already happened. You’re saying “I recognize I’ve taken your time” or “I realize I’m interrupting you.” This version often appears when closing a conversation or following up.
The meaning difference is subtle but real. Native speakers instinctively choose the right one based on timing, even if they can’t explain the grammar rule. Professional writers should understand this distinction for polished communication.
When Should You Use Each Phrase?
Use “sorry to bother you” when initiating contact or requesting something. This phrase works at the beginning of emails, when approaching someone in person, or when starting a phone call. It signals you’re aware you’re interrupting.
Professional emails often start this way: “Sorry to bother you, but I have a question about the Johnson account.” You’re acknowledging you’re taking their time before you actually do.
In-person interruptions benefit from this phrase: “Sorry to bother you—do you have the budget spreadsheet?” You’re apologizing before making your request.
Phone calls work similarly: “Hi Sarah, sorry to bother you. Can we discuss the timeline?” The apology precedes the discussion you’re requesting.
Use “sorry for bothering you” when concluding an interaction or referring to a past interruption. This phrase appears at the end of conversations or in follow-up messages.
Email endings frequently include it: “Thanks for your help. Sorry for bothering you with this.” You’re acknowledging the time they spent helping you.
Follow-up contexts use this form: “Just checking in. Sorry for bothering you again about the report.” You’re referencing the previous interruption.
When reviewing business emails, I notice professionals instinctively use “to bother” at the beginning and “for bothering” at the end. This pattern reflects the timing logic naturally.
How Do You Use These Apologies in Writing?
Correct Usage Examples
Email openings favor “sorry to bother you” for its forward-looking politeness. “Sorry to bother you on a Friday afternoon, but could you review this contract?” works perfectly for initiating contact. The phrase softens your request by acknowledging you’re interrupting their time.
Professional messages to busy colleagues benefit from this phrasing: “Sorry to bother you during the busy season—I need five minutes to discuss the budget.” You’re showing awareness of their workload while making your request.
Customer service contexts use both versions. Opening: “Sorry to bother you, but I noticed an error on your invoice.” Closing: “Thanks for your patience. Sorry for bothering you about this issue.”
Casual workplace conversations allow either phrase. Approaching a coworker: “Sorry to bother you—can I grab those files?” Leaving their desk: “Thanks! Sorry for bothering you during lunch.”
Follow-up emails naturally use “for bothering.” “Hi again. Sorry for bothering you twice in one day, but I have one more question.” This acknowledges the repeated interruption.
Text messages to professional contacts work with both. Starting: “Sorry to bother you on the weekend.” Following up: “Got it, thanks! Sorry for bothering you.”
Incorrect Usage Examples
❌ “Sorry for bothering you, but can I ask a question?” (using past tense when initiating)
✅ “Sorry to bother you, but can I ask a question?” (infinitive for future interruption)
❌ “Thanks for your time. Sorry to bother you with this.” (using future tense when concluding) ✅ “Thanks for your time. Sorry for bothering you with this.” (gerund for completed interruption)
❌ “Sorry to bothering you” (mixing infinitive marker with gerund)
✅ “Sorry to bother you” or “Sorry for bothering you” (grammatically complete)
❌ “Sorry for bother you” (missing gerund ending)
✅ “Sorry for bothering you” (proper gerund form)
Context Variations
Business emails use these phrases frequently for professional politeness. Internal communications between colleagues stay brief: “Sorry to bother you—quick question.” External emails to clients or vendors add more context: “I apologize for bothering you, but we need to discuss the delivery timeline.”
When editing customer service templates, I’ve seen companies standardize on “sorry to bother you” for all initial contacts to maintain consistency. This works well because most customer interactions involve reaching out first.
Instant messaging at work allows casual variations. Slack messages might say: “sry to bother” or skip the apology entirely among close teammates. Formal business platforms like email maintain the full phrase.
Academic contexts use these phrases in professor communications. “Sorry to bother you during office hours” acknowledges you’re taking their available time. “Sorry for bothering you with so many questions this semester” works in a final thank-you email.
Personal relationships rarely need these formal apologies. Friends text “hey quick question” without the elaborate politeness. Professional relationships require the social lubricant these phrases provide.
Common Mistakes People Make
| Mistake | Example | Why It’s Wrong | Correction |
| Wrong tense at opening | ❌ “Sorry for bothering you, here’s my question” | Uses past tense for future action | ✅ “Sorry to bother you, here’s my question” |
| Wrong tense at closing | ❌ “Thanks for the info. Sorry to bother you.” | Uses future tense for past action | ✅ “Thanks for the info. Sorry for bothering you.” |
| Missing “for” | ❌ “Sorry bothering you” | Gerund needs preposition | ✅ “Sorry for bothering you” |
| Mixing forms | ❌ “Sorry to for bothering you” | Combines both incorrectly | ✅ Pick one: “to bother” or “for bothering” |
| Overusing in one message | ❌ Multiple apologies in brief email | Sounds insecure | ✅ Apologize once, strategically |
The most common error is using “for bothering” when initiating contact. This happens because people think about the interruption they’re creating rather than the grammar timing. The interruption will become real, but at the moment you’re saying it, it hasn’t happened yet—so “to bother” is correct.
Reverse errors occur less frequently but still appear in email closings. Writers say “sorry to bother you” at the end when they should use “for bothering” to acknowledge the completed interaction.
Form mixing shows up in casual writing where people aren’t paying attention. “Sorry to for bothering” combines both structures incorrectly. Choose one approach and stick with it.
Over-apologizing undermines professionalism. Some writers include both phrases in one message: “Sorry to bother you… [content]… sorry for bothering you.” Pick one moment to apologize and make it count.
Which Phrase Sounds More Polite?
Neither phrase is inherently more polite than the other. Politeness comes from using the grammatically appropriate phrase at the right moment, not from choosing one form over another.
“Sorry to bother you” sounds appropriately polite when initiating contact because it shows advance awareness of the interruption. Using “for bothering” here would sound awkward, potentially making you seem less polite because the grammar feels off.
Similarly, “sorry for bothering you” sounds right when acknowledging completed interruptions. The past-tense acknowledgment fits the situation naturally.
Context determines perceived politeness. A quick “sorry to bother you” before asking a coworker a question sounds friendly and professional. The same phrase in an email to a CEO might benefit from more elaborate framing: “I apologize for reaching out directly, but this requires urgent attention.”
Adding context enhances politeness more than choosing between these phrases. “Sorry to bother you on your day off” shows more consideration than just “sorry to bother you.” The extra detail demonstrates genuine awareness.
Professional settings appreciate either phrase used correctly. Across business communications, both appear with equal frequency. What matters is matching the phrase to the timing of your interruption.
How Do You Remember Which to Use?
Think about timing: “to” = about to happen, “for” = already happened. This simple rule works for most situations.
“To bother” contains “to,” which points forward in time. “To go,” “to do,” “to ask”—all these infinitives describe future actions. Apply that same logic here.
“For bothering” contains “for,” which explains a reason or cause. You’re explaining why you’re apologizing—because you bothered them. The action is done.
Another memory trick: “to” starts the conversation, “for” finishes it. Opening emails use “to bother,” closing emails use “for bothering.”
Ask yourself: “Have I already interrupted them?” If yes, use “for bothering.” If you’re just about to interrupt, use “to bother.”
Position in the message helps too. Beginning of message = “to bother.” End of message = “for bothering.” This pattern holds true in most professional writing.
Wrapping Up
“Sorry to bother you” works when you’re about to interrupt someone—it’s a forward-looking apology before making a request. “Sorry for bothering you” acknowledges an interruption that’s happening or already occurred—it’s a backward-looking apology for time already taken.
Both phrases are grammatically correct and equally polite when used in their proper contexts. Choose based on timing: use “to bother” when initiating contact, and “for bothering” when concluding or following up. Understanding this simple timing distinction helps you communicate more naturally in professional and personal interactions.
Frequently Asked Questions
Both are correct. Use “sorry to bother you” when initiating contact, and “sorry for bothering you” when concluding or referencing past interruptions.
Neither is more polite. Both are equally polite when used at the appropriate time. Use the grammatically correct form for your situation.
Yes, “sorry for the bother” works as a concise way to apologize for any inconvenience caused. It’s more formal than the other variations.
Yes, “sorry to bother you” is grammatically correct. It uses the infinitive form to indicate a future action you’re about to take.
“Apologies for bothering you” works the same as “sorry for bothering you”—use it when acknowledging an interruption that already occurred. It sounds slightly more formal.
Yes, both phrases are appropriate for professional emails. Use “sorry to bother you” when opening, and “sorry for bothering you” when closing.
Yes, “sorry for disturbing you” is grammatically correct and means the same thing. “Disturbing” feels slightly more formal than “bothering.”
No, constant apologizing can seem insecure. Save these phrases for situations where you’re genuinely interrupting or making an unusual request.





